Boo! Were you scared? Just a little? You would have been more scared if the column had been empty. But I wouldn’t do that to you, would I? After all, I promised. And besides, we’re friends, aren’t we? Yes, and friends don’t scare each other, do they?
So what are you dressing up as for Halloween? A ghost? A witch? A recent retiree? They can be pretty scary—Velcro sneakers, white, mid-calf socks, polyester Bermuda shorts, white cotton tank-top—you get the picture (whose Dad did I just describe?). Steve Hampton spotted a recent retiree recently, our very own Steve Kobiela, although he wasn’t wearing Velcro sneakers. Steve (the 1st one) writes:
"I attended very nice retirement ceremony for Steve Kobiela in the CINCLANTFLT Flag Briefing Room Present were members of his directorate, his parents, and his family (wife Nancy and two children Megan and Christopher). The guest speaker was Steve's boss, CAPT John "Jay" O'Brien Jr. For those of us who went to SWOS Basic in Newport in the summer/fall of ‘81, you will remember CAPT O'Brien (then LTJG) as one of our best instructors (and all around great guy).
I will not go into all of Steve's distinguished career details, but I will recount a few highlights. Starting as a Surface Warrior in 81 and earning his SWO pin as a Ensign within a year, Steve served in amphibs and cruisers from 1981-1987. He participated in ops from Grenada to Lebanon to the Persian Gulf. He converted to Intel in 1987. During Desert Shield/Desert Storm, Steve was a key to Battle Force Red Sea and the JFK Battle Group success with his Intel and Strike support. He went on to develop Tactics and Procedures for the surface community at SWDG as Tac Intel Director from 1991 to 1994. He finished his distinguished career here at CINCLANT as the Intel Requirements Officer.
I suppose his retirement ceremony was standard in recognizing all that he had done. What I thought was important, though, was Steve's recollection of all those that had touched him along the way, starting with the Class of ‘81 and that summer at SWOS. At the end, Steve thanked his parents for the guidance and opportunity they had provided. He presented flowers to his wife and daughter. Then he presented his Navy sword to his young son Christopher with the caveat that Christopher should choose to do what he wanted in life, but IF he joined the military, to GO NAVY.
The point is, I was captured by the circle of events in Steve's career and, at the end, I was struck by what we all know; it is sometimes not necessarily the end that counts most, but more often the path traveled. (Deep thought for me....that is as deep as I can go!)."
Steve (the 1st one) is at CINCLANTFLT N819, C4I/Combat Systems Requirements. Emails: hamptonsw@clf.navy.mil, swhampton@juno.com, 757-836-3555. Hmmm, not as scary as I thought, but well done nonetheless.
Now, here’s a scary riddle. When is a president a vice president? Give up? When he’s our very own Bob Ravener. Apparently not satisfied with being merely El Presidente of the Banana Republic of ’81, Roberto went and got himself elected VP/Chief Personnel Officer of Footstar, Inc. out of Mahwah, NJ (No, the prison’s in Rahway). Yes, after more than 10 years of slogging through caramel colored HR syrup at Pepsi, Bob’s traded soda for shoes and is now up to his ears in EVA midsoles and trying to tell a straight last from a curved. You may know Footstar from their FootAction stores in your local mall, but their Meldisco division runs the footwear departments in KMarts nationwide. Bob’s contact info is still valid.
Got any invites to scary Halloween parties yet? Me neither. Did get a few to rotorhead Change of Commands, one from some guy named Pete Sciabarra (Naw, never heard of ‘em either) who snatched the reins of HC-11 on September 10th out on that island north of San Diego and the other Neil Hogg who did a similar rein change with HSL-46 in Jax on August 21st. Don’t believe me? I have "Official Guest" parking passes to prove it.
Otto got an invite, too, as follows:
"Believe it or not, I just received a Change of Command invite from none other than Tom "Tarzan" Carlson. He took the helm of SEAL Team 1 on July 14th in Coronado. In 17 years, he’s never graced the pages of that illustrious alumni periodical. I can understand why his picture has been omitted, but his name is relatively innocuous. So, if you have it in your heart, I implore you to rectify this oversight and mention his accomplishment (a really small pitch is acceptable)."
Still not scared, huh? I’ll bet those guys are, ‘specially if they find out they’re CO of a bunch of losers? Yeah, that’s scary. I can just imagine the FITREPs they’ll write—with lines like, "This man is depriving a village somewhere of an idiot" or "She sets low personal standards and then consistently fails to achieve them" or "This officer has delusions of adequacy" or (for you engineers) "So dense, light bends around him" or (my personal favorite) "I would not breed from this officer." Thanks, Otto.
Oooh, scary people with green paint on their faces. No, they’re not ancient Celts--that was blue paint. These are Marines and they’re brand spankin’ new LTCOLs (lieutenant colonels for the Marine averse among you). Now, sound off and send me contact info and an update when I call your name: Steve Baker, Dave Beydler, Todd Coker, Joe Dauplaise, Jolene (Young) Hollingshead, Pat Kanewske, Pete Loughlin, Frank McCallister, Junior Ortiz, Ildefonso Pillotolive, Mark Schwan, Gary Slyman. Now, they can command squadrons and battalions and other things that go "Boom!" in the night.
Scary picture time. First, July 4th picnic and then the golf tourney. Actually, Otto, only one of the picnic pix had the right combo of resolution, flattering pose, and alumni presence to get in and that was Stu Forsyth and daughter, Sydney. Other picnic pix are welcome.
As you read last month, golf at Ft. Meade, June 5th was fun and now we have pictures, some scary, some not so scary.
Tailgate update. Same spot as last year. Blue side near the quonset hut along Cedar Park Road. Blue tent with ‘81 on it will be up approx two hours before kickoff. BYOB, food, chair, etc.
And now, scary thoughts for a slow month. Tips for Yankees traveling down south. (1) "Y’all" is singular. "All y’all" is plural. "All y’all’s" is plural possessive. (2) The "He needed killin’" defense is valid. (3) Florida is not a southern state—There are far more Yankees than Southerners living there.
Laws to calm your fears. Law of Common Sense: Never accept a drink from a urologist. Law of Probable Dispersal: Whatever hits the fan will not be evenly distributed. Conway’s Law: In any organization there is one person who knows what is going on. That person must be fired. Law of Drunkenness: You can’t fall off the floor. Osborne’s Law: Variable won’t. Constants aren’t.
Trivia from the far NE. The name "Wendy" was made up for the book Peter Pan. The longest recorded flight of a chicken is 13 seconds. The Eisenhower interstate system requires that one mile in every five must be straight. These straight sections are usable as airstrips in times of war or other emergencies. Hershey’s kisses are called that because the machine that makes them looks like it’s kissing the conveyor belt. If a statue in a park of a person on a horse has both of the horse’s in the air, the rider died in battle. If the horse has only one front leg in the air, the rider died of wounds received in battle. If the horse has four feet on the ground, the rider died of natural causes. The airplane Buddy Holly died in was named "American Pie." In a deck of cards, the king of spades represents King David, clubs, Alexander the Great, hearts, Charlemagne, diamonds, Julius Caesar. In 1987, American Airlines saved $40,000 by eliminating one olive from each salad served in 1st Class. A life-size Barbie’s measurements: 39-23-33. Average life span of a major league baseball: 7 pitches. Youngest pope: 11 years old. And my personal favorite—A duck’s quack doesn’t echo, and no one knows why.
Why am I telling all y’all this? Because insomnia messes with your brain as the hours drag on. Contemplate that when you can’t get to sleep on a dark . . .. scary . . . night.
Later, .